I created this one with an After School Workshop group. After schools are tricky, because you only have an hour a week, the age ranges can be a bit wacky (this group is like 7 - 12 or something) and the participants come straight after school, so are traditionally extremely haywire. This was a really long process of brainstorming, improvising scenes, cutting characters in and out, and it all went really well. In the end they got the script about three weeks before we went on, so they did an awesome job getting their lines down (mostly!). Before you ask: yes, the actor playing Grandma Slug was adorable.
Onwards, to a small Fairy Tale!
a small Fairy Tale
by Hadley and participants of After School Drama Workshop
Narrator: Once upon a time there was a wicked step-mother, who was so terribly mean to her poor suffering step children.
Step children sit watching TV, farting and stuffing their faces.
Step Mother: I brought you some food, dears.
Kid 1: Get out of the way!
Kid 2: Change the channel!
Kid 1: Where’s my food?
Kid 2: Get out of the way!
she leaves
Narrator: The kids thought maybe she would be less mean if they could make her laugh, so they played a funny prank on her.
Kid 1: Did you replace her soap with glue?
Kid 2: Did you replace the glue remover with sleep poison?
Step Mum: Umm, dears, do you know why my hand is glued to my face?
Kid 1 & 2: Here, let us help!
Step Mum: Oh, thank you dears.
Narrator: Then they dragged their wicked step mother out to the forest and left her there.
She yawns and wakes up, and looks around.
Step Mum: Hmm, this isn’t my kitchen.
Old Grandma Slug: Hello, it’s me, old Grandma Slug.
Step Mum: Hello old Grandma Slug, can you tell me where my house is?
Old Grandma Slug: Well! What you want to do is go left past the old big tree, now you’ll see three big trees, but you want to go left at the one on the right, not right at the one on the left, because otherwise you’ll end up going the wrong way, if you do go the wrong way though you’ll end up at another big tree and if you see that big tree you should turn around and go back the way you came, unless you see two big trees, which means you’ve sort of gone the right way, so take a left turn at the right tree and you’ll get to the other tree which you should take a left turn at the second right big tree, it’s all very simple so off you pop!
Step Mum: Umm... thankyou!
Old Grandma Slug: Also, watch out for ninjas.
Narrator: The evil step mother looked around wickedly for a big tree, and—
Step Mum: Excuse me?
Narrator: Umm... what?
Step Mum: Could you please stop calling me evil? I’m just trying to get home.
Narrator: Look, lady, everyone knows that the step mother in fairy tales is evil. Anyway, here comes a frog.
Frog: I’m a frog!
Step Mum: Hello, frog. Do you know where my house is?
Frog: I’m a frog!
Step Mum: ...That’s great!
Frog: I’m a frog!
Narrator: The sinister step mother got very tired, and found a small house in the woods. She went in and sat down, and fell asleep. Little did she know, that the house belonged to the three little zombies!
Zombie 1: I’m hungry.
Zombie 2: I think we managed to shake that crow.
Zombie 3: Hey, why is our door open?
They see the step mother, and do the screaming gag.
Zombie 1: Who are you?
Zombie 2: What are you doing?
Zombie 3: Why are you here?
Step Mum: Sorry, I’m lost, and I just got tired, and...
Crow: I’m a crow!
Zombie 1: Oh no!
Zombie 2: The crow!
Zombie 3: Got my arm!
They run around trying to get the arm back.
Step Mum: Stop that!
Crow: Why should I?
Step Mum: Because... because I am a Step Mother, and this is a fairy tale, so I am a wicked step mother, and if you don’t give that arm back I’ll pluck every one of your feathers!
They stop, crow gives the arm back to the Zombie.
Step Mum: Wow, being wicked really gets things done. Will you guys help me get back to my house?
Zombie 1: We sure will!
Zombie 2: Definitely!
Zombie 3: You bet!
Crow: Just leave my feathers alone!
Narrator: Meanwhile, back at her house...
Kid 1: Feed me!
Kid 2: Change the channel!
Kid 1: Some wicked step mother, more like lazy step mother.
Kid 2: Yeah, where is she?
Kid 1: Oh wait, didn’t we leave her out in the forest to die?
Kid 2: Oh yeah!
Kid 1: Now who’s going to feed us?
Kid 2: And change the channel!
Kid 1: It’s time she stopped slacking off, let’s go and get her back!
They have trouble getting out of their chairs, and leave stage.
Narrator: Meanwhile the Wicked Step Mother, the 3 Little Zombies, the Crow, and the Narrator were lost in the forest still.
Zombie 1: I told you it was this way!
Zombie 3: No, it’s that way!
Zombie 2: What do you know, you can’t even keep your arm on!
Crow: Delicious arm...
Narrator: When they were jumped by the Five Scorpion Ninja Clan
Ninja 1: Hai! I am Explosion Fist of the Five Scorpion Ninja Clan!
Ninja 2: Hai! I am Explosion Foot of the Five Scorpion Ninja Clan!
Ninja 3: Hi... I am Dave of the Five Scorpion Ninja Clan.
Ninja 1: Hey, I was here first!
Ninja 2: No you weren’t!
Ninja 3: Who even cares who was here first...
Ninja 1: You are slow like the turtle!
Ninja 2: Well, you are slow like the slug!
Ninja 3: I don’t even want to be a ninja, I want to be an accountant.
Step Mum: You’d better watch out, I am a wicked step mother!
Ninja 1: Argh!
Ninja 2: Help!
Ninja 3: Hide!
Step Mum: You know what, I don’t want to go back to my house.
All: What!
Step Mum: I’m having much more fun hanging out with you guys being wicked! Let’s go to ...
Narrator: And they all lived happily ever after! Except for the two lovely step children.
Kid 1: Where are we?
Kid 2: You got us lost!
Kid 1: No I didn’t, you did!
Kid 2: I’m hungry.
Old Grandma Slug: Hello, it’s me, Old Grandma Slug!
Kid 1: We’re lost!
Kid 2: Feed us!
Old Grandma Slug: I can help you get back to your house, it’s easy. First you’re going to want to head to that big tree over there...
The end!
No comments:
Post a Comment